The one where I buy a box of Magnum.

No, not those kind of Magnums. The kind in the frozen section of the store which contain chocolate. Wonderful, wonderful chocolate.

So this morning while I was on the phone with my mom about the stray cat my sister picked up and tried to save which bit her and could possibly have rabies (they sent it to get tested), the Burrito decides to wake up and play in the toilet.

There was pee in the toilet. And tp. Apparently it was his new game.

SO, things I did this morning/afternoon?

• bathed toddler
• wiped every surface in bathroom with bleach
• took sheets off of beds just in case he tried to climb up them
• threw out his paci
• went to Target for new bathroom rug
• bought bag of fun-size Milky Ways and box of Magnum dark chocolate ice cream bars
• craved copious amounts of alcohol
• said "eff this" and went to Wendy's for lunch
• left said toddler in the car with a/c on while I took everything into the house and only thought about someone taking him and car for two seconds before The Ransom of Red Chief popped into my head.

It didn't help that this morning was also hitting day, spill your watermelon on the floor day, throw a ball at the end table which has a lamp and glass of water on it day, and run into every wall you can day.

But we did snag some spectacular finds at tarjay, thanks Leslie for this idea:

I told him to hold the box of choc-pb pop tarts (yes, they exist!!) but apparently what he heard was "clutch them like they will stop the apocalypse"

6:19

6:19. Six. Nineteen. AM.

That is what my clock said this morning when hubs came in and plopped a toddler in my bed. He was up getting ready for work (early shift at second job) and apparently thought that the burrito needed to come in bed with me.

Ten minutes later, he starts poking and kicking me, and I realize he has no paci, which helps soothe him back to sleep if he wakes up. So, get up, get paci, give to kid, go downstairs, try not to kill husband, let dog out and feed him (Leroy will start whining the second hubs leaves the house for some reason if he's still in his kennel), and go back up to bed.

I didn't get back to sleep until 7:30, which was superb because the burrito decided to wake for good at 8. Yaaaaay. Ah well. It was a mom's group gtg day anyway, so playplace for breakfast it was!

And of course that brings us to naptime - he's not taking it well these days. This weekend he was gated in his room and played with his books and blocks for an hour before falling asleep. Great, whatever. Past two days? Oh, the screaming. It's what we've always done, pick whatever toy you want to take with you, let's go upstairs. Nope! Not having it today or yesterday. I had to carry him up and put him in his bed, and yesterday it was about 45 minutes of alternating between crying, yelling "let me outta my room mama," and letting out these awesome banshee-type cries, which if he was in danger would come in handy, but in a townhome all they do is alert the neighbours you may be attacking your child and CPS should be on speeddial. ::repeat:: Yaaaay.

So, a new timer or clock is on our list of things to procure, and he can henceforth go to his room for "quiet time" if necessary, if he naps good (he apparently passed out after only 15 minutes of screaming today), if not, fine, but I need a little bit of time alone if we're going to keep up this work schedule that hubs has going.

*sigh* I miss these days

My weekly list that is turning into a once-a-year list, oops.

Total weight gain/loss: ah crap, this had to be the first category didn't it. I'm at a total of 16 lbs gained, and 4 lbs away from my "I don't want to cross this" line. I really need to stop going for bagels.

Maternity clothes? I was in mat clothes by 10 weeks this time. I'd like to rock some more dresses too, but I need bike shorts or spanx to deal with those babies - one word: chafing.

Stretch marks? The ones on my thighs are back, but I haven't seen any on my belly...yet.

Sleep: IT'S TOO DAMN HOT IN PA TO SLEEP. SEND ME A BIGGER A/C UNIT AND THEN WE'LL TALK.

Best moment this week: um...getting ice cream? oh wait, the Burrito started "talking" to the Pecan this week. It's pretty cute. He leans over to my belly and goes "hi baby!" in a high, quiet, squeaky voice.

Movement: so much. hiccups abound, as do the occasional kick to the right side. I'm pretty sure she's punching my left pelvic bone and kicking my right underboob at the same time - is she running out of room or something?! that's impossible, I'm sure, because as I stated above, 4lbs away from my previous-giving-birth weight. And she's not going to top 8lbs. RIGHT, little girl?

Food cravings: chocolate cake. salads with ranch dressing.

Gender: it's a girl!

Labor Signs: lots of fun BH, since about 20-some weeks I've been feeling them I believe.

Belly Button in or out? Shallow, but still in.

What I miss: doing any activity that involves reaching my feet.

What I am looking forward to: floating in a pool, once the damn thing opens. I'm way too big for the baby pool at this point. I'd kick the poor Burrito out just sitting down.

Weekly Wisdom: stop eating, dammit!

Milestones: I will be getting a double stroller this week! yay!