first birthday pictures

For your viewing pleasure!

The burrito the day before his party, with his present from his uncle, a new John Deere lawn mower:
















At his party, "opening" his presents - or, watching the other kids open them. And, checking out a toy with daddy.
 
 



 













The presentation of the cake: momma and dada blew out the candle.

 Time for cake!!

Ahhhh, cold.

Not the illness kind, the temperature kind. This morning it was about 60 degrees. It still is, actually. and I LOVE it!

The Burrito let us sleep in for a bit - 9am, big stuff for us. This was after his 7am wake-up and whine for milk. We got him bathed and dressed (in his "will work 4 milk" tshirt, naturally). Came downstairs while the daddy worked on a cover letter for future use - he wants to work in an ER someday, which is beyond me, but go him, because I could not fathom that! I help people by feeding them, lol.

I got the Burrito started with some puffs while I got the rest of his food together: yoBaby apple yogurt, a nutrigrain-type waffle with a hint of real maple syrup, and a perfectly ripe pear. I made myself some coffee, and of course showed the Burrito the way to make a perfect pot in our mini-coffeemaker as I am the only coffee-drinker in the household (it would stunt Leroy's growth). Some caramel creamer and it was ON LIKE FALL. It was so glorious. Opened the kitchen door to the sunroom, let the cold sweep in, sipped my hot coffee, ate my waffle and pear - because if I have something the Burrito does not another whine-fest ensues. I try to make us the same food to get us ALL used to a healthier diet. I know, waffles...but come on now. We can't all make homemade bread ::coughashletcough::.

Actually - english muffin bread is on my list of things to try this fall. I'll add some more of that list later, now it's time to go buy/prepare for the Supreme First Birthday Bash!

Not who I wanted to be today.

Did you ever have a day where you just weren't the person you wanted to be? Like, you got to the end of the day and looked back and said whoa... What happened? I wouldn't have done that. But, you did.

I had one of those days. Truth be told, i've been having a lot of them often. Days where I think to myself, I don't normally do this. I can get more done. I can do things differently. But, it's just not true. I mean maybe I could have - the me from two years ago. The current me? The one with a demanding horrible awful job and the wonderful child? Not so much.

Just another wonderful reason I'm in wonderful therapy.

Do you have days like this? Where you can't seem to get it together enough to make a simple phone call? You don't remember appointments? And at the end of the day when you say eff it instead of running which you know will make you feel better, you don't know who you are anymore? God I hope it's not just me. That would make going crazy awfully lonely.

Maybe sleep will help.

The current status of things; or, less than 20 days until his birthday.

I have no idea how it went this fast. The past year, I mean. I'm busy preparing for his first birthday party, which means attempting to make a #1-shaped photo collage, and just looking through the pictures brings back memories.

And also? Sometimes looking at those pictures after he's gone to bed make me forget what he looks like now, so I have to sneak into his room to peer at his sweet sleeping baby face.

And then, I have to take 5 minutes to tiptoe out on certain floorboards that don't creak. Stupid house built in 1925. But this may all be solved with the addition of "baby crack" to the burrito's room...

ANYWAY. An update of sorts, or a timeline rather, to show the boy's progress since I last updated:

9 months - two bottom teeth pop out; he completes his primer on crawling and begins to hate the bouncer; we start doing full meals with snacks and he self-weans to two bottles and three nursing sessions a day

10 months - two bottom teeth are fully in and two top teeth come in, one at at time; he begins to climb the stairs; table food is a must all of a sudden and he's dining with the big kids now

11 months - four shiny new teeth and momma's nips hurt; walking commences! he is now able to drunken-stagger from one room to the next; self-weans to two bottles and TWO nursing sessions a day; eating off of momma's plate and demanding bites when not in his high chair

That's right folks, walking. It's a crazy thing. He's also started this new hating-my-crib project, where the goal is to sleep in a parental lap or bed. Sooooooo we're letting him cry it out (CIO for you newbs). Sunday, Monday, suckage; he acted like the crib was torture. Chinese water-boarding. The Guantanamo Bay of baby sleep areas. It took over an hour of crying, with two breaks for momma-comfort and a replacement pac. I really need to get to the store and get that baby crack already. When it stops raining.

So, his birthday coming up. There was some dramz, because we have a tiny tiny house and don't want to sardine these folks. I'm planning some decorations, but there is a LOT to do - I took two full days off before the party (Thursday, the day of his birth last year, and Friday) to help compensate. We still need to figure out the food and the cake. Sammich tray, yes. Everything else? Clueless. As of right now, it's fall-ish outside, so do we stick with lemonade? Or go with apple cider? Argh!

Then, I'd like to finish that collage and make him a happy birthday banner that matches his colors on his invitation. Here is it, btw:

Cutest baby evah. I love the face, and the hat. It's from vacation. Saving that for a whole notha post, if I ever get the time for that. Bah.

So, time for bed - didn't get to run my mile tonight, but hey, I worked until 715 instead, for overtime - OH WAIT I don't get that. ::searches classifieds::

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Yes, I'm complaining about complaining.

So I like to vent occasionally about how life isn't perfect and not exactly what I want it to be right now. Everyone does it. Am I of the camp that If you don't do anything to change it, you should just shut up? Not really - freedom of speech is a pretty good thing, and you're never going to stop all the people all of the time from complaining. I have this argument with myself every four years or so around November, because of the inevitable voting gossip, and the amount of people who every year remark "if you don't vote, you don't have any right to complain about the outcome."

I may ignore you if you complain an insane inordinate incomprehensible amount though. I think venting is good to some degree, but there are those that take it too far. A lot of them live in my state. I had a discussion about this with hubs recently - he was remarking that it seems like the culture in our area is more prone to complaining and whining that others. I found that interesting, and would totally have researched it had I been in psych or soc 101.

But I digress. Recently I was venting about parental things - I believe it was when I was talking to someone at work about a dinner plan for some night in the near future - and my complaint went something like, I would like to have more time at night to be able to go out and do things, but right now with my schedule (getting home from work really late at different times each night) and with the burrito's needs (eat, eat, play, eat, sleep and maybe fuss a bit in there) I don't really like to mess up the home-night-life so that he gets more out of whack. And I've been noticing something when I complain lately: some other mothers keep saying "well I've done that before" or "yeah, we used to do that too" or even "we had it worse."

So, I figure I can take this three ways:

1) person listening is one-upping me 

2) person listening wants me to shut it

3) I am seriously failing at life in general if everyone I talk to keeps saying they've done it and I can't.

For 1 and 2, I'm pretty sure that I may  be underestimating the amount or tone of my complaining and I should just stop and solve my problems on my own. Pity party at home, with some alcoholic beverages instead. Whine to the dog, text my sister. For a set time limit. And then move on.

Maybe I'll use a timer.

Poor dog.

But for 3, ah, well that is a horse of a different color. Because lately? I totally feel like I am failing at life in general. I know that people have done what I have done. I know that I can use every hour of every day. But when I have ten unfinished projects around my house, laundry to be folded, and a sink full of dishes - and I just got the kid to sleep and all I want to do is write a blog entry and go to bed so I can get up to exercise and oh my good lord it's 11 and I'm running out of time - then, THEN, I feel #3.

Am I alone in this? I don't think so. But it would be nice to know others struggle(d) with it.

Question mark?

Meaning, I'm not sure how to title this one. I want to write more here; lots more, in fact. It's one of the coolest things I like to do online, along with Pinterest, which is slowly replacing all my magazine clippings (insert hubs' excited face here).

But recent happenings have made me want to dig deeper into why I want to write. First off, I love writing and anything having to do with writing. My dream job at 15 was to be a book editor in NYC. I was the master of essays in high school - I could polish off one of those babies in 20 minutes (5 paragraphs, with thesis statement). I still yearn to be an English teacher when I grow up.

But what makes me want to share my thoughts/feelings/opinions/experiences with you, O Mighty Interwebz? Probably what I like to think of as my inner teacher/showoff. I love teaching. Sometimes, it gets to the point where I'm not sure if I've passed the "instruction" line and gone all the way to "because I know so."

Now I have been seeing lately that some so-called Mommy Blogs have become focused on one thing or another - you can tell some are about the dough, some are about photography, some are about daily struggles faced by many moms. I go back and forth between wanting to write to help people who may be in the same position, and wanting to be a blogger that people follow, and look up to, and enjoy - and who people recommend. I want to be humble, but don't want to end up shouting "look over here! Look how humble I am!"

So I'm going to look at the reason I started this blog: 1) to keep a record of my journey and Good Things I find along the way ::coughmarthacough:: 2) as a place for me to come to and vent, write, and share - with a possible side effect being advising others, but remembering that's not my main purpose. One of my favorite quotes, author not recalled, goes "the best way to give advice to the young is to give it and be uninterested as to whether or not they take it."

So, you may see some things that you don't know about me on here. I will be posting more about my daily struggles. You will see some bad things, and sad things, and whiny things. If you don't care to read, that's fine. If you care to comment, please do! If my choices have helped you in some way, that is a very welcome side effect.

Tuesday List

Yes, that's right, I'm so behind in everything that this Tuesday list is coming out on a Thursday.

Or, I changed what day it is - I'm cool like that. More powerful than the World's Greatest Spokesperson in the World, more awesome than the awesomest babysitter. And, I watch too many TV commercials.

So, here goes:

1) clean your damn kitchen floor already, GOSH
2) decide on the burrito's 1st bday invitations (deadline: Monday) and send them out (deadline: Friday)
3) do laundry
4) clean up the sunroom, including the island and cabinets, and the dog's bed and kennel
5) give the poor dog a bone bath
5.1)brush the poor dog's teeth, then give him a bone
6) figure out weekend schedule, what with dinners, my aunt visiting from Fla, hubs working, and vacay bible school on Sunday
7) take the Burrito's 10 month pics on Saturday (technically, 10.5 months, but WHO CARES! Not you! I order you not to care! Besides, you get a supremely cute picture in exchange for not noticing the date...)
8) do something that closely resembles exercise.

Well, there you have it folks. A glimpse into my day-to-day listmaking. Also, Lefty, I want to publicly apologize for the amount of time it took me to find my way to the pumping room. I know, I hurt your mammary-feelings. Blame those damn chips I move across the country. Have I mentioned hating my job before? No? Then here's your quarter for the day.

Peace!

(aaaaaand, I'm so behind that this was posted on a Friday!)